~@~@~ Happy Days ~@~@~

Ooooooooooops, I have to write something here,,,, this is the beginning, hmmmm, new entry will come out in next few weeks, I guess,,,,see, I am getting lost, let me start to find out myself. Who I am? Who I am going to be? Who I will be?

今天去看桂河大桥了！很有历史纪念意义的地方。看过桂河大桥电影的人一定晓得！

那些死去的人的墓地

其中一个墓碑

桂河大桥

有一个女孩和一个男孩从小一起长大， 青梅竹马。 他们小时候， 一次， 女孩对男孩说：“我是你的GF……” 男孩问：“什么是GF？” 女孩说：“是Good Friend的意思。 后来他们长大了，又一次， 女孩对男孩说：“我是你的GF……” 男孩问：“什么是GF？” 女孩说：“是Girl Friend的意思。”再后来他们结婚生子， 一起生活了一辈子，幸幸福福， 美美满满． 一直到他们到了风烛残年…… 夕阳下，两位白发苍苍的老人—— 女孩对男孩说：“我是你的 GF……＂ 男孩问：“什么是GF？”女孩微笑回答：“Give Forever！”

 

2009年了，越来越老了，咋办？？？是个人见了都问啥时候嫁人。。。看来真要考虑考虑这个serious问题了～～～不过头很大啊，唉，不管了，就都当耳边风吧，先玩够了再说！ Don't make a fuss!

 

今年虽然没回家过年，不过在曼谷至少没有受到国内过节气氛的影响而郁闷，所以还能专心工作，除夕夜还吃了大餐！哈！还有今晚的春晚还不错～。大年初一虽然上班，不过也在KBank闹腾了一下，嘿嘿。唯一的遗憾就是错过了同学的婚礼和聚会～！还有，不会犯上节假日综合症！

 

昨晚是S1的2009 kick off party，哈，太好玩了！！！还有抽奖！偶终于抽到了！可是，，，结果，，，是每个人都有份啊！！！可惜咱们中国人还是太腼腆了，都是那些老外在疯，我们就乖乖的看和笑。

 

其实很多好玩的事情，不过现在都懒得跟大家汇报了，下班回来总想回来看片放松一下。总算忙过了一阵，不过又要开始忙下一阵了，各种新春伊始的celebration也都差不多了，要开始计划2009年了！嗯，最近的目标是减肥，Lisa MM竟然说我胖了，难道是因为换了个发型？嘿，安慰一下自己～

 

现在人多了，又可以去打羽毛球啦！嘿嘿！

 

CHEERS, 2009!

 

 

又是一个圣诞节了，似乎每年回忆最多的节日就是圣诞节了，因为总是那么多人大家可以高高兴兴地一起过，虽然今年一个人跑去了Assupmtion Church，等了4，5个小时，还丢人了（具体细节就不描述了～～），还饿惨了，结果等到12点，终于开始了，发现没有英语的，，，，不知所云，，，，，撑到快两点了，，，回家！。。。不过总之也过圣诞啦，可惜没有大家陪着，唉～～～ 想厦门啦，，，怀恋还在厦大的时候的厦门。。。可惜现在大家都各奔东西，人去楼空了。伤感，，，，JJMM们赶紧来安慰一下我吧～～～～～～～～～，祝你们越来越漂亮，赶紧嫁出去（这个是最重要的，嘿嘿）。

 

I am getting a lot of things in my mind these days.......and very hard to fall sleep every night, it really makes me crazy and exausted, just like what I said, the life is tough without lead. But I believe that, tomorrow should be a sunny day. :)

 

I happened to see ZQ's space tonight when I was hanging around friends space. It made me a little sad on him and also felt sorry about him, he should be seriously gloomy at that time, especially when he knew that girl already moved to live with some guy, he was really sad when he was talking with about that, but I do not comfort him, on the contrary, I said somthing which made him unhappy, it should be......anyway, say sorry to him. :)

 

Go through the past few years, everything was changing, I don't know where I will be and who I will be in the coming couple years, I did doubt that and expect that as well. I always appreciate everybody I met in my life whatever he/she is good or bad to me, because those pieces of feeling made my life colorful and also made me grow-up. Compliment is necessary, complain is also important. If something or somebody disappoints you, it doesn't mean that it is not good enough, you should keep in mind that it doesn't fit to you, it doesn't belong you, that's all. Only thing/person appropriates for you is the best, that is the exact definition for the BEST.

 

I am easy to be annoyed by some guy, especially when it relates to moral standards, yes, there are high moral standards in my heart, so when somebody does something or says something which is against the moral standard, I always freak out..... I always keep thinking, why he/she did that so easily? What's his/her moral principal in his perspective? Yes, when you being in this complicated society, you gonna meet many kinds of person, for now, I do appreciate the rule: you have to learn to accept it, instead of changing it, or you will be that bad guy or sad guy. That's what we always say: We have to accept the natrual diversity. :)

 

I don't know why I am talking about these here, at this time, maybe just like Jonny said, something made me look unhappy. Feeling is complicated and unstable especially for women's. Maybe I want to get something or I lost something in somewhere or I expect something. There should be something I need but I cannot get, that's why I look dull I guess. Actually, I am enough old to own something, but the fact is that I have nothing, it is really sad, even don't mention the ambition. That's why we struggle to live under the high pressure(Because part of them is f rom ourself). Another fact is that, we are not living just like a simple individual, we have families and friends, so it means that we have to involve them when we do something or say something, we call it duty. Somebody lives for these kind of duty and somebody not, you can choose your way to live.

 

About the love, it is a eternal topic. Of couse, everybody is confused about it, including me. but no doubt, you will encounter it time by time even you don't want, but it just like a kind of out-of-control feeling, so you don't know when it will come and when it goes, just make it casual, when you are feeling it, smile(happy), when it is gone, smile also(thankful), am I right? :)

 

Haha, time to sleep!  

 

曼谷似乎暂时恢复了平静，机场也开通了，谢谢大家的关心噢～，其实我身在其中不知危呢，可能旁观者更清吧。

在曼谷的人越来越少了，这周末又回去了两个，，，，大家每周唯一的乐趣就是打羽毛球了。。。这次过来，我可是每周都没落下啊～记得第一次去打就把手拉伤了，第二次去没怎么敢用力，等手好了，结果脚又扭了。即使是这样，还是坚持每周打！呵呵～现在是腿上到处青一块紫一块。。。是不是太卖命了？没办法，笨女人吗，只要是喜欢的高兴的，就傻傻的付出。，不过流汗的感觉真的很爽，而且技术也有提高～呵呵。可是也因此冷落了我的瑜伽垫。。。惭愧啊。。。

不知道是不是因为人越来越少了，心情有点沉闷，因为政局动荡，好久没出门了，这周末跑去买了一堆东西回来～，逛了central plaza完逛Markro，一个人噢！大包小包，6，7包，不过70%是给大家买的零食，25%是我们宿舍这周的口粮，5%是自己的：一个包一个手链，还是大大的购物袋（之前刚买的那个前阵子上街回来后发现被划了个好长好长的口子！郁闷死我了，因为啊，虽然不到20块，可是大大的，背着又炫又爽，嘿嘿），不过这次这个就低调了，黑白的，素素的，还是超便宜啊，不到30块，哈。顺便还给老弟也带了个包，当然不会告诉他价格啦！哈！看上去还不错的样子，回去骗骗他，嘿嘿。手链呢，不到20，喜欢喜欢，，，，呵呵。

回来马上去厨房下锅炖了一大锅排骨！放了绿豆，花生，红萝卜，枸杞，党参片，炖了大半个下午，好喝啊！！！记得绿豆花生早上要先泡上噢～发现自己越来越有当家庭主妇的潜质了，哈。昨天还收拾了一天的厨房和客厅，累死了。，，，，家里的洗衣机这两天就没休息过，，，把大家睡过的传单被单通通都洗了一遍。。。。没办法，谁叫我心情不好的时候就想干家务呢。。。。让那些都见鬼去吧，，，，通通洗掉了去。。。。Don't be silly any more.

不过，偶终于有了自己的羽毛球拍啦，哈。从我们老大那3折买进，因为他那天把我给灌醉了，于是让我捡个便宜，好像长这么大还是第一次吐，据说吐在电梯里了，可怜的电梯啊，还好没吐在Mook的车里，否则她肯定kill me 。不过发现吐了比较好，要不然肯定要过敏好几天了，不错不错，值得，哈。

明天又要上班啦，有点烦，因为我们lead竟然要跑路了，虽然他在也帮不了啥忙，可是，，，到时候来个新的lead，我还要再跟他解释一遍，，，估计等他搞清楚了我们CFSD和CTSD也已经sign off了，郁闷郁闷。。。。

圣诞节马上要到了，，，以前都在鼓浪屿和一群人过的，今年，，，没计划，，，干脆去电影院看电影好了，哈，要不然shopping的话肯定大出血。。。

想着，2009年马上要到了。。。有点彷徨，有点犹豫，planning......................

不歪歪了，准备睡觉！

 

 

真的很谢谢George，短短的聊天，就说出了很多心里想说的话。

 

 

当舞者失去了轴心，不知是否还能在舞台上旋转起来。

虽然努力去习惯这一切，为什么还是心痛。突然很理解姐姐每次提起往事时伤心流泪的心情。

可是当姐姐得到了她想要的时候，这一切却离我越来越远。

心好麻木，为什么这么简简单单的爱、关怀和信任对我而言变得这么奢侈。

或许希望越多失望越大，或许是我付出不够多，或许。。。

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爸爸，妈妈，姐姐，弟弟，你们在我心中永远是第一位。请相信我。